Sunday, March 11, 2007

The Talk of Diplomacy

I was watching NBC nightly news last night, as the anchor and a reporter repeatedly gave their spin on the fact that the U.S. ambassador and an Iranian delegate spoke together during a summit in Iraq aranged by Prime Minister Maliki. The NBC crew hailed it as a turning point in Iran-U.S. relations and played it up as the panacea for all of the problems that the U.S. has with Iran. The reporter did not know precisely what was said between the two diplomats, but fortunately for us, Jules Crittenden has the actual transcript.

Abbas Araghchi: “How wonderful to see you, you apostate dhimmi-loving Afghan pig!”

U.S. Ambassador Zalmay Khalilzad: “You smell like a goatherd! Let me guess. Price of soap up again?”

AA: “Enough pleasantries. Have you been enjoying our armor-penetrating explosives?”

ZK: “Your military attache is having sex with many men for the cameras at Abu Ghraib as we speak!”

AA: “Touche! I understand your president is on a dogleash of his own in Washington! Ha ha ha!”

ZK: “Do you still have those women locked up in Teheran? Ooooh … women’s rights activists … scary! Hey, is that a nuclear weapon in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

AA: “Just wait until we have completed our peaceful nuclear energy program!”

ZK: “Ha ha ha! We don’t intend to!”
Yes, it is diplomatic exchanges such as these that will surely solve our problems with the intractable enemy that is in Iran. Read the whole story here.

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